Microblog: A very long article Wikipedia article on the orientation of toilet paper [Jun 7th, 22:52] [R]

Tuesday, May 29th, 2012

Men in Black II

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Men in Black ]



Twenty-five years ealier, MiB agent K has refused to help Queen Lauraana and keep the Light of Zartha on Earth; the treasure was sent back, preventing at the same time Serleena to put her tentacles on it. Now K has left the agency and works at a post office. But Serleena is back on Earth and is looking for the Light of Zartha, and K is the only one who knows where it is. J therefore de-neutralizes K and allows him to recover his memory, but the latter had neutralized his memories of the Light of Zartha twenty-five years ago and cannot remember, he only left a set of clues for himself. Meanwhile, Serleena had killed the owner of a pizza shop (that happens to be related to the clues leading to the Light of Zartha) and J didn't want to neutralize his employee, Laura. The latter therefore tags along with J and K. Serleena then invests MiB headquarters, that is therefore locked down, J and K are on their own. Serleena finally concludes that the Light is in Laura's bracelet, but after defeating Serleena, K reveals that the Light is still on Earth, that Laura *is* the Light of Zartha, and that she has to leave Earth before midnight or the planet will be destroyed. K also hints that Laura could be his and Lauraana's daughter.

[ Posted on May 29th, 2012 at 21:52 | 1 comment | ]

Thursday, May 24th, 2012

The Accidental Spy

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Jackie, an orphan, is contacted by a private detective who tells him that his father, a wealthy Korean man and a former spy, is still alive but dying, and wants to give him his inheritance if he can follow the clues. Jackie ends up in Turkish bank where he retrieves a large sum of money and a small package. He soon gets attacked but fences off the thugs. Then he meets two women: Carment, a Koran reporter and Yong, whose scarf is embroidered with the same text as one of his father's clues, before being attacked again. The reporter happens to actually be a CIA agent and she tells him that the thugs are after a plant producing a super-opium. The other woman appears to be working for Lee, a crime lord, to whom Jackie's “father” had promised the plant. Jackie escapes Lee's clutches, and the latter offers Jackie the life of the woman in exchange for the plant. Jackie eventually finds out the location of the plant (2 vials, hidden by a Turkish priest, friend of his “father”) and gives it to Lee. Jackie tells Carmen what he has done, but as Yong dies, he tries (and after a long car/truck chase, manages) to recover the vials, but is severely wounded. Waking up in hospital, he is told by the “private detective” (actually a US agent) that this was all an intelligence mission with Jackie as the main agent to recover the plant.

[ Posted on May 24th, 2012 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Sunday, May 6th, 2012


Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



While scanning phone numbers in the hope of accessing a game company's server, David Lightman unknowingly connects to W.O.P.R., a computer that integrally and automatically controls the USA's response to a nuclear attack (this scheme was implemented after the military noticed that 20% of the personel affected to missile launching was unwilling to actually launch them). The computer lists games, from chess and backgammon to global thermonuclear war. One of the game's title hints that Stephen Falken had programmed the computer. Falken had disappeared mysteriously, and David, convinced there is a backdoor in the system, spends a week out of school trying to figure out the secret password, which happens to be “joshua”, Falken's dead son. David then asks the computer to play global thermonuclear war, without noticing that he started a simulation that made the militray at NORAD believe that USSR was actually attacking. The military manage to understand that no such attack is actually happening, but the computer continues its simulation, and through a TV broadcast, David discovers what he has done. He is arrested by the FBI and brought to NORAD, where he discovers that Falken is still alive and lives under a false identity. David escapes NORAD with a group of tourists, and with the help of his friend Jennifer, visits Falken. The latter refuses to help them at first, but eventually goes with them back to NORAD. There the military have lost control of the situation and truly belive the soviets have launched their missiles. David then makes Joshua play tic-tac-toe agains itself, and the computer then notices that there are games that cannot be won. It then plays all possible scenarios of thermonuclear war and learns that the same applies to that game. The computer relinquishes control of the missiles just in time.

[ Posted on May 6th, 2012 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Sunday, April 29th, 2012

Office Space

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Peter works as an unhappy software developer, in a company plagued by bureaucracy and uncaring managers. One day, his girlfriend takes him to a session with a hypnotherapist. The latter has a heart attack in the middle of the session, leaving Peter in an out-of-character state. Peter then decides not to care about work anymore, and becomes much happier at work. He even gets promoted, while two of his friends are kicked out. Together, they decide to plant a virus into the company's accounting system that would re-route the fractions of cents normally rounded down to their bank account. But because of a mistake in the virus, much more money than what they expected gets transferred. No knowing what to do and facing jail time, Peter decides to return the money to the company and to take all the blame. But another disgruntled worker (he had been laid off five years earlier, but because of a glitch in payroll software, continued to be paid; the management decided to repair the glitch, but didn't tell the guy, and moved him to an “office” in the basement) finds the checks Peter slipped under his manager's door and takes the money before setting fire to the company. All traces of the fraud has disappeared in the fire, and Peter is much happier in his new job as a construction worker.

[ Posted on April 29th, 2012 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Sunday, April 15th, 2012

Conan the Barbarian

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]


Horror Cult Films

Conan's people are killed by Thulsa Doom's warriors, who are seeking steel. Conan is taken as a slave and eventually grows very strong. He's then trained to be a gladiator, and later freed by his master. Conan then searches for his people's crest in the hope to find Thulsa Doom and avenge his parents. He befriends two thieves, Subotai and Valeria, and together they steal a large jewel from the Tower of Serpents. Thulsa Doom has become the leader of a powerful cult and the Tower of Serpents is home to some of his followers. King Osric then asks the three adventurers to bring his daughter back from Thulsa Doom's influence. Conan leves alone on his quest, but is caught by Doom and left to die. He's saved by his two friends who have eventually decided to join him on his quest. They sneak into Thulsa Doom's temple and free the princess. Doom attacks their camp to retrieve the girl, but fails; when he attempts to kill the princess, the latter finally understands that Doom is a monster and wants to go back to her father. Valeria was killed in the attack, and Conan then sneaks back into Doom's temple and kills him while the latter is addressing his followers.

[ Posted on April 15th, 2012 at 11:27 | no comment | ]

Saturday, April 7th, 2012

Iron Sky

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



In 2018, two Americans land on the dark side of the Moon, officially in an attempt to promote the reelection of the president, and unofficially to search for helium 3. They discover a large industrial complex, built by the Nazis who had fled Earth in 1945. One of the astronauts is killed, but the second one, James Washington, is taken prisoner. There he meets Renate Richter, the daughter of the local mad scientist. Renate's father finds out that Washington's mobile phone is way more powerful than their computer, and is exactly what they need to power the Götterdämmerung, a gigantic space ship meant to take over the Earth. Renate is kind, has a naive understanding of the Nazi ideology, and she wants to help Washington return to Earth. Following her advice, the latter pretends to have succombed to his brainwahsing, and accompanies Klaus Adler, who wants to become the next Führer as soon as possible. Upon their arrival in New York, Adler and Renate accidentally meet the PR agent of the president who sees in them a possibility for getting the president reelected, promoting the positive aspects of Nazi ideology. After a few months, the Führer arrives on Earth and confronts Adler, having discovered his plan, but gets killed. The space-Zeppelin fleet that has been following him however starts launching an attack on New York. Adler returns meanshile to the Moon with a load of mobile phones for powering the Götterdämmerung. The president of the USA is thrilled by the war, which should ensure her reelection. At the UN, she discusses the space attack, and it turns out that every nation has weapons in their spacecrafts (except Finland) ; their joint armada defeats the Zeppelins, then bombs the Moon base and turns to the Götterdämmerung. Meanwhile, Renate and Washington have flown back to the Moon as well and sabotage the huge ship, killing Adler in the process. Renate and Washington decide to stay on the Moon, re-educating the locals to teach them about tolerance, while the nations of Earth fight each other for the control of the reserves of helium 3 from the Moon.

[ Posted on April 7th, 2012 at 23:18 | 1 comment | ]

Sunday, March 4th, 2012

Sherlock Holmes

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Holmes arrests Lord Blackwood, a practitioner of black magic who has killed several persons. He is sentenced to death, hanged, and Watson pronounces him dead. He has however warned Holmes on the day of his execution that something bigger than him was going on. Holmes is then asked by Irene Adler (who is working for a mysterious man) to find a midget with ginger hair. The man is found in the coffin on Lord Blackwood, who has been seen earlier that day coming out of his grave. Holmes is then asked by important members of the government to stop Blackwood. They reveal that they (and Blackwood) are members of a secret society that controls all key areas of the British Empire. Soon after, a few of them are killed in mysterious circumstances that look like sorcery. Holmes then tricks one member of the society, secretly working with Blackwood, into reavealing their plan: killing all the members of the Parliament who don't want to follow Blackwood in his conquest of the world. A wirelessly-triggered machine that will deliver poison to the Parliament's ventilation system is hiddenn in the sewers. With the help of Watson and Irene Adler, Holmes prevents the poison to be released, and eventually gets Blackwood killed. He also learns from Irene that she is working for Moriarty, and her escape with the poison part of the machine was just a diversion allowing Moriarty to steal the wireless component fo the device, which is what he was really after. Holmes finally explains that Blackwood was not a real sorcerer and that all was made with tricks.

[ Posted on March 4th, 2012 at 23:50 | no comment | ]

Touchez pas au grisbi

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]


© Cinemagora

Max le Menteur a réussi à voler 8 barres d'or pour une valeur de 50 millions. Son complice Riton, qui avait dit à sa fiancée qu'ils n'auraient bientôt plus de soucis d'argent, se fait enlever par Angelo, qui veut le torturer pour savoir où est caché le magot. Max se refuse d'abord d'aider Riton, qui est vraiment trop con pour son propre bien, mais décide finalement de donner l'or à son adversaire en échange de son copain. Juste après l'échange, qui s'effectue de nuit sur une route peu fréquentée, des complices d'Angelo essayent de tuer Max et Riton, et mais ce dernier est mortellement blessé lorsque lui et Max rendent la monnaie de sa pièce à Angelo. Malheureusement, dérangés par un camion qui passait par là, ils ne parviennent pas à récupérer l'or. Le lendemain, Riton meurt de ses blessures.

[ Posted on March 4th, 2012 at 23:45 | no comment | ]


Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Three high-school boys, Andrew, his cousin Matt, and Steve find a strange artifact in the forest, in a hole in the ground. After that, they start developing telekinetic powers (and the hole where the artifact was has of course caved in). Soon, they discover they can fly, in addition to moving things at a distance. Andrews mother is dying from cancer, and his alcoholic father accuses Andrew to cost too much money so that he cannot afford the medicine for relieving his wife's pain. From this point on, Andrew goes crazy, indirectly causing Steve's death (the latter sensed he was angry, founnd him flying in a thunderstorm and got struck by lightning). Later, Andrew decides to use his powers to steal money so that he can by medicine for his mother. But he is accidentally injured in the robbery and taken to the hospital. There, his father tells him his mother died and accuses Andrew of being the reason why he could not be with her at that time (because he was looking for Andrew). From this point on, Andrew becomes completely crazy and starts destroying the hospital and the buildings around him, while Matt tries and stop him. Matt finally kills Andrew.

[ Posted on March 4th, 2012 at 15:27 | no comment | ]

Saturday, February 25th, 2012

Ne nous fâchons pas

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]


© Notrecinema.com

François, ancien gangster, prête de l'argent à deux anciens amis et les aide à quitter la France. En remboursement, ils leur donne le nom de Léonard, qui leur doit de l'argent. Ce dernier prend des paris clandestins risqués et « oublie » de rembourser ses clients lorsque le cheval gagne. La vie de Léornard est menacée par l'Anglais. Ce gangster cherche à supprimer Léornard car ce dernier semble en savoir long sur le coup que le premier prépare. Comme François refuse de le laisser tuer avant qu'il n'ait récupéré tout son argent, l'Anglais charge sa troupe d'hommes de main poser des bombes sur leur chemin. Sans domicile, ils finissent par se rendre chez la femme de Léonard (qui déteste ce dernier), où ils sont encore une fois attaqués par les anglais. François, qui voulait éviter de recourir à la violence, finit par céder et fait exploser tous les hommes de main de l'Anglais. Ce dernier, faute d'hommes de main, abandonne son coup.

[ Posted on February 25th, 2012 at 12:20 | no comment | ]

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Molly Mahoney was a prodigy pianist as child, but she now struggles to complete her first concerto. As a day job, she works at Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, a magical toy store owned by Mr Magorium, who is 243 years old. Magorium decides he has lived long enougn and it is time for him to die. He even hires an accountant, nicknamed Mutant, to put some order in his carefully-collected but never-sorted piles of bills and papers. But the shop becomes sad when it understands Magorium's intentions, and turns all gray. Mahoney tries to convince Magorium to stay longer, but the old man has made his decision. Mahoney then wants to sell the shop, as she doesn't belive she can run a magical shop the way Magorium did. She is eventually convinced by Mutant that she has the magical spark, and the stores gets its bright colors back.

[ Posted on January 31st, 2012 at 22:21 | no comment | ]

Saturday, January 28th, 2012

Les particularités de la pêche nationale

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Comédie russe de 1998. Des copains partent à la pêche pour quelques jours. Ils doivent aller en bateau au chalet en bord de mer de l'un d'eux, non loin de la frotière entre la Russie et la Finlande. Ils se trompent de chemin et arrivent par accident au chalet d'un Finlandais, en Finlande. Ils y débarquent leur 15 cartons de vodka et passent la nuit à boire en compagnie du propriétaire, poli et étrangement silencieux. Lorsqu'ils se rendent compte de leur erreur, ils repartent en catastrophe et vont au chalet où ils auraient dû aller depuis le début. Mais ils ont oublié leur provision de vodka. Ils fraternisent avec un officier de la marine russe qui les aide à convaincre un sous-marinier spécialiste des opérations clandestines de les transporter discrètement dans les eaux finlandaises pour les débarquer là où ils ont laissé leur vodka. La police est déjà sur les lieux (le propriétaire a voulu ouvrir un hotel et y servir la vodka de contrebande qu'il a découverte chez lui, mais il s'est fait arrêter par la police). La vodka est récupérée, mais pour échapper à la police, ils doivent utiliser la vodka comme carburant supplémentaire. Ils réussissent finalement à rentrer chez eux.

[ Posted on January 28th, 2012 at 22:10 | no comment | ]

Friday, January 20th, 2012

Astérix aux Jeux olympiques

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Alafolix est amoureux de la princesse Irina de Grèce, que son père voudrait bien voir épouser Brutus, fils de Jules César, afin de bien se faire voir de ce dernier. Brutus étant un individu imbu de lui-même qui cherche par tous les moyens à assassiner César, Irina décide qu'elle épouserait le gagnant des Jeux olympiques. Astérix, Obélix et Panoramix se rendent donc en Grèce pour aider leur ami. Les gaulois sont tout d'abord disqualifiés pour avoir usé de la potion magique. Brutus aussi triche, mais il a corrompu les juges par la menace. Finalement, devant l'évidente tricherie de Brutus, César décide d'une unique épreuve, une course de chars, pour décider qui serait le vainqueur des jeux. Brutus fait enlever Panoramix pour qu'il lui prépare de la potion magique. Ce dernier fait mine de céder mais ajoute à la potion un colorant qui montre, à l'issue de la course, que Brutus à usé d'une substance illicite pour améliorer ses performances. La victoire de ce derner est donc annulée. Brutus ayant fait de son mieux pour éliminer tous les autres adversaires durant la course, Alafolix gagne donc l'épreuve. Alafolix et Irina se marient à la fin des jeux.

[ Posted on January 20th, 2012 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Thursday, December 15th, 2011

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Transformers ]



The reason NASA went to the Moon is to explore the wreck of an alien ship (which happens to contain a weapon that could have ended the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons). In the present, the Autobots discover a fuel cell from that ship in Chernobyl, leading them to learn about the wreck on the moon and the retrieval of part of the weapon and of Sentinel Prime (revived by Optimus thanks to the gadget found in the previous movie), the inventor of the weapon and the only one who knows how to use it. It turns out that Sentinel was actually allied with the Decepticons because he thought it was the only way to end the war. His plan is to use the weapon (actually a long-distance transport system) to take Cybertron to the Earth and use the humans as slaves to rebuild it. An endless battle in Chicago (where the Decepticons are installed) ensues, and is won only because Sam's new girlfriend manages to turn Megatron, the leader of the Decepticons, against Sentinel (by whom he feels his authority is threatened).

[ Posted on December 15th, 2011 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Monday, December 12th, 2011

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



As confusing as first time I watched it, Finnnish subtitles didn't help much this time either. Just check the summary on Wikipedia

[ Posted on December 12th, 2011 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Thursday, November 17th, 2011

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Transformers ]



The Fallen is a Decepticon that has been hiding far away in the solar system and wants to find the key to a device, hidden somewhere on Earth, that would destroy the sun and produce energon. The Decepticons are chasing Sam because he got infused with a bit of the All Spark, has visions of symbols (of the language of the Primes) that can lead him to the key and is now the only one who can actually find the key. The autobots are protecting Sam, but Optimus Prime is killed. Sam then looks for the key that should allow to ressuscitate Optimus. They finally locate the key in Egypt. After a long battle for the control of the device (located at the top of a pyramid), Sam manages to save Optimus Prime while the army destroys the device.

[ Posted on November 17th, 2011 at 22:28 | no comment | ]

Thursday, November 10th, 2011

20,000 Leagues under the Sea

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



1868. In the South Pacific, ships are destroyed by a mysterious monster. Prof. Arronax is investigating the mystery when his ship is attacked by the monster. It is actually a submarine named the Nautilus, whose captain, Nemo, enventually decides to take in the professor and the two other survivors of the attack. Nemo and his crew live exclusively from products of the sea, and together they fight against everything that is used for making war, thus saving the lives of the thousands who would have been killed by the destroyed hardware. As the Nautilus reaches its base, it is ambushed by British forces (directed to the island by messages-in-a-bottle sent by one of the companions of Arronax) and Nemo is mortally wounded. He then decides to sink the Nautilus and his whole crew with him. Arronax and his companions manage to escape just in time.

[ Posted on November 10th, 2011 at 20:46 | no comment | ]

Sunday, October 16th, 2011

Men in Black

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Men in Black ]



Just read Wikipedia's page Men_in_Black_(film).

[ Posted on October 16th, 2011 at 15:23 | 1 comment | ]

Sunday, September 18th, 2011

The Five Venoms

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



The dying master of the powerful Poison Clan asks his last pupil Yang De to find his five predecessors who have been taught five different styles of kungfu: the Centipede, the Snake, the Scorpion, the Lizard and the Toad. Their names and whereabouts are unknown (they don't even all know each other), but the master worries that some of them might have used their skills to do evil, and that they are especially after the treasures hold by yet another, much older student. The Centipede is seen by a witness at the house of the oldest pupil, who has been found dead with his whole household the next morning. Officers He and Ma investigate and find clues that they were killed by the Centipede and the Snake, and that the yet unknown Scorpion has got the map to the treasure. The Toad then helps the helpless policemen to arrest the Centipede. But the judge in charge of the affair, a friend of the Snake, sends He on a bogus errand and corrupts the witness into telling that he saw the Toad and not the Centipede that night. The Toad is then “suicided” in his cell by a corrupt policeman, who is himself later killed by the Centipede, as is the witness. When He comes back, he meets Yang De and together they decide to take down the Centipede and the Snake. Officer Ma tags along, and reveals himself to be the Scorpion. The three evildoers are eventually killed by the two remaining heroes.

[ Posted on September 18th, 2011 at 14:58 | no comment | ]

Sunday, August 28th, 2011


Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Due to overpopulation, Humanity has moved to another star system made of a dozen planets. Some of those have a common government, the Alliance, but the others are more like the Far West. River is a psychic who has been conditioned by the Alliance, but is rescued by her brother. They are chased by an unnamed Alliance agent, and find refuge on the Firefly by becoming passengers of the ship. Reynolds, the ship's captain who had fought during the failed rebellion agains the Alliance, has to resort to raiding banks for survival. At a bar, River receives a subliminal message and starts fighting everyone until her brother shouts a secret keyphrase that makes her sleep. Reviewing recordings of the incident with the help of a hacker, Mr. Universe, they notice that River said “Miranda” before starting to fight. Reynolds wants to get rid of the unpredictable River and her brother, but he is then contacted by the Alliance agent who makes clear he wants to kill River. Malcolm refuses to surrender her. The agent then kills all the people who have helped Malcolm in the past. River then tells Reynolds where to find Miranda, an planet marked as unhabitable. To go there, they have to cross a region of space controlled by the Reavers, mad humans who raid ships and eat people alive. They disguise the Firefly as an ship that has already been a victim of the Reavers, and manage to reach Miranda. Upon landing there, the crew of the Firefly discovers that the planet is perfectly habitable, but all its inhabitants are dead, bearing no sign of fight or pain. They later find a recording explaining that the Alliance has tried a drug that would make people more peaceful, but it just made people completely inactive, and they eventually died. One small fraction reacted in the opposite way and became the Reavers. Reynolds then decides to broadcast the message through Mr. Universe's equipment, but the agent knows what he intends to do and is waiting for him with a whole fleet. Reynolds attracts the Reavers's ships that are around Miranda and unleashes them on the Alliance's fleet. The Firefly then lands on Mr. Universe's planet. The crew barricades itself to hold the attacking Reavers back, Mr. Universe has already been killed by the agent, but after a fight with the latter, Reynolds manages to broadcast the message and let the truth about the scheme of the Alliance be revealed.

[ Posted on August 28th, 2011 at 10:15 | no comment | ]

Thursday, August 18th, 2011

Le cave se rebiffe

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Éric Masson, vendeur de voitures américaines d'occasion, apporte à ses usuriers, Charles Lepicard et Lucas Malvoisin, au lieu de l'argent qu'il leur doit, une proposition : imprimer de la fausse monnaie. Le mari de sa maîtresse est un graveur hors-pair qui travaillait (à son insu) pour un faux-monnayeur qui vient d'être arrêté, et il prétend pouvoir convaincre ce Cave de travailler pour eux. Lepicard, tenancier d'un hotel de passe fermé par la police, propose de faire revenir de sa retraîte à Caracas le Dabe, ancien faux-monnayeur. Ce dernier accepte mais veut prendre 50% des bénéfices. Les trois autres tentent alors d'acheter le double de papier et de produire le double de faux billets. Mais le Dabe, en discutant avec le Cave, se rend compte de quelque chose, et le convainc de n'imprimer que la quantité convenue initialement, ce qui lui laisse le temps de nettoyer l'imprimerie avant que les autres n'arrivent pour prendre livraison des billets. Le Dabe et le Cave partent ensuite ensemble pour Caracas.

[ Posted on August 18th, 2011 at 10:19 | no comment | ]

Monday, August 15th, 2011

Transporter 3

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Frank Martin is kidnapped and coerced into transporting a package, in the company of a girl. Both wear bracelets that explose if they get too far from the car. The kidnapper tels Frank to go first to Budapest, then Bucarest, and finally Odessa. Frank soon understands that the package is the girl, who happens to be the daughter of the Ministry of the Environment of Ukraine. The latter is thus blackmailed into accepting several loads of toxic waste into his country for processing, while at the same time preparig for a speech on saving the environment. Frank delivers the girl to the villain, escapes the goons, chases them in his car while they are on a train by landing with the car on top the train. He eventually kills the villain with his own bracelet and saves the girl just before her father reluctantly signs the authorization papers.

[ Posted on August 15th, 2011 at 16:16 | no comment | ]

Tuesday, August 9th, 2011

Le labyrinthe de Pan

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Espagne, 1944. Un capitaine de l'armée fasciste fait venir sa nouvelle épouse, enceinte, et sa fille Ofelia, dans son camp dans la montagne. Il a pour ordre d'éradiquer les maquisards communistes, opposants au régime. Ofelia, férue de contes de fées, découvre le labyrinthe qui se trouve à coté du camp et y rencontre un faune. Ce dernier lui explique qu'elle est la réincarnation de l'esprit de la princess Moanna, qui doit un jour retourner au monde souterrain. Ofelia doit accomplir trois tâches avant la pleine lune, afin de prouver sa valeur. La première tâche consiste à faire avaler des pierres magiques à un crapaud géant vivant sous un arbre creux, et lui permet de trouver une clé. La deuxième consiste à prendre une dague dans la demeure d'un ogre sans réveiller ce dernier. Ofélia parvient de justesse à prendre la dague, mais réveille le monstre parce qu'elle a ignoré les conseils du faune. Ce dernier est faché et disparait. Peu après, la mère d'Ofelia meurt en couches. Le docteur ne peut cepenant pas l'aider, car il vient d'être tué par le capitaine, qui avait découvert ses liens avec les rebelles. Ofelia est ensuite capturée en train de fuir avec une servante qui était aussi une rebelle. Cette dernière parvient à blesser le capitaine et à s'enfuir. Le faune réapparait et lui dit de prendre le bébé dans la chambre du capitaine et de le rejoindre dans le labyrinthe. Là il lui dit qu'une goutte de sang du bébé ouvrira le portail vers le monde souterrain. Ofelia refuse de blesser l'enfant, et est découverte par le capitaine (qui ne voit pas le faune), qui reprend le bébé et tire sur Ofélia. Pendant ce temps, les rebelles attaquent le camp, récupèrent le bébé et tuent le capitaine. Le sang d'Ofélia coule sur la pierre-portail, et tandis qu'Ofelia meurt, l'esprit de Moanna retrouve ses parents dans le monde souterrain, le faune lui dit qu'elle a réussi à accomplir la troisième épreuve, à savoir préférer verser son sang que celui d'un innocent.

[ Posted on August 9th, 2011 at 18:03 | no comment | ]

Sunday, August 7th, 2011

Les barbouzes

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]


© Allociné

Benard Shah, marchand d'armes mais aussi acquéreur de brevets sur les armes bactériologiques et nucléaires, meurt à Paris dans une maison close. Francis Lagneau, agent secret français se faisant passer pour le cousin de Benard Shah, est chargé de ramener discrètement le corps à sa femme, Amaranthe, résident dans un chateau en Allemagne, ainsi que de récupérer lesdits brevets. Il n'est pas seul sur le coup, des agents allemand, suisse et soviétiques se présentent aussi comme amis du défunt. Un américain se présente plusieurs fois, sans couverture, offrant une somme toujours plus importante pour les brevets, mais se fait jeter par la fenêtre par les quatre agents européens. Des asiatiques se sont aussi introduits dans le chateau par divers passages secrets et éliminent le personnel pour prendre leur place. Ils sont finalement éliminés à leur tour par les européens. Les agents ont pour ordre de séduire la veuve, mais seul le français y parvient, et part avec elle à Lisbonne chercher les brevets dans un coffre de banque. Ils sont rejoints par les trois autres agents et par l'américain. Les premiers s'enfuient en train vers la France, font des plans de voyage de noce, mais sont à nouveau rejoints par les quatre concurrents. Lagneau éjecte les trois européens du train, mais Amaranthe lui dit que l'américain l'a menacée pour qu'elle lui donne les brevets. Lagneau retrouve l'agent, lui reprend les brevets et ejecte le concurrent à son tour. Finalement, Amaranthe lui montre le chèque de quatre millions de dollars que l'américain lui avait donné en payement.

[ Posted on August 7th, 2011 at 11:10 | no comment | ]

Monday, July 18th, 2011

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 2

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Harry Potter ]



Conclusion to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1

Harry and his friends have rescued Griphook from the clutches of Voldemort, and now ask him to help them break into Beatrix Lestrange's vault at Gringotts. They find another horcrux, made from Helga Hufflepuf's cup, which they destroy as soon as they have escaped from Gringott, flying away on its guarding dragon. They then return to Hogwarts, where a vision of Voldermort's told Harry that another horcrux is hidden there. They guess it is Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem, which had been lost for centuries. Harry's return seeds a revolt in the school, which is soon attacked by the Deatheaters. Thanks to the ghost of Rowena's daughter, Harry understands that the diadem is in the room of requirements, and manages to get it and destroy it. The attack on the school is terrible, and Voldermort calls off the attack but asks Harry to surrender. While looking for Voldemort's snake Nagini (which is the last horcrux), the three heroes witness Voldemort killing Snape for the control of the Elder wand, but Snape still manages to give some memories to Harry. The latter thus learns that Snape had been in love with his mother for a long time, and had always been working for Dumbledore. He also learns that when Voldemort failed to kill him as a baby, a piece of his soul went into Harry, making him a horcrux as well ; Harry must thus die for Voldemort to be able to be killed. Harry then meets Voldemort, but doesn't really die when hit by the latter's curse: instead, he discusses with Dumbledore in some kind of limbo. When Voldermort and his troops enter a devastated Hogwarts carrying Harry's body, the latter escapes and eventually duels with Voldemort. Neville Longbottom, who had found Griffindor's sword in the sorting hat (that was lying among the rubble), kills Nagini, rendering Voldemort mortal. The latter's curse rebounds on him, finally killing him. Harry catches the Elder wand and decides to destroy it. In the epilogue, nineteen years later, Harry and Ginny's kids, accompanied by Ron and Hermione's board the Hogwarts Express at King's Cross Station.

[ Posted on July 18th, 2011 at 21:32 | no comment | ]

Saturday, July 2nd, 2011

The Seven Per-Cent Solution

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Sherlock Holmes has become addict to cocaine and is delusional about his former math tutor, Professor Moriarty, being the mind being organized crime in London. With the help of Sherlock's brother Mycroft, Watson lures Holmes to Austria to meet with Sigmund Freud, who has had success in treating patients with an addiction to cocaine. After a few days, Holmes is better, and accompanies Freud to visit another patient of his, Lola Deveraux, who just threw herself into the river. Holmes discovers that Lola had been kidnapped and forced to take cocaine again. Soon after, she disappears from the hospital with no trace of struggle, and Holmes deduces that she was abducted by her lover, Baron von Leinsdorf. By catching the Baron's provider of cocaine, they learn that the latter has contracted lots of debts in Monte Carlo. The debts have been bought by the shah of the Ottoman empire, who wanted to Lola Deveraux for his harem in exchange. Holmes, Watson and Freud follow the shah's train with a train they borrowed and eventually manage to catch the shah. Holms kills the Baron in a duel and saves Lola. Before leaving, Freud hyptnotizes Holmes and the latter reveals that when he was a child, he had witnessed his father killing his mother because she had an affair with Moriarty. In the end, Holmes takes a holiday and when Watson asks him what he should tell his readers about that story, he answers that Watson should pretend Holmes was killed in a fight against Moriarty.

[ Posted on July 2nd, 2011 at 13:41 | no comment | ]

Thursday, June 30th, 2011

Police Academy 4: Citizens On Patrol

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Police Academy ]



Commandant Lassard wants to train normal citizens to become police auxilliaries, in the hope to strengthen the bond between police officers and citizens. While he's off to an international Police congress in London, Captain Harris replaces him as head of the academy. But Harris hates the idea, and does his best to discourage the new recruits. On their first assignment on the field, the Citizens On Patrol foil an undercover police job, Harris is more than happy to cancel the program. But when his aid is tricked into lets a bunch of crimninals out of the jail of the precinct, the citizens on patrol help the police catching them. The program is then considered a success by the representatives of the foreign police forces invited by Lassard to visit the academy and the city.

[ Posted on June 30th, 2011 at 13:08 | no comment | ]

Sunday, June 26th, 2011

Astérix et les Vikings

Translation: [ Google | Babelfish ]

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Lorsque les Vikings apprennent que la peur donne des ailes, ils partent, sur les indications de Cryptograf leur shaman, en campagne en Gaule chercher un champion de la peur. En même temps, Goudurix, neveu d'Abraracourix, est envoyé par son père dans le village d'Astérix afin de devenir un homme, un vrai. Malgré l'enseignement d'Astérix et d'Obélix, Goudurix ne parvient pas à surmonter sa peur, et les Vikings l'enlèvent, voyant en lui le champion qui leur apprendra à voler. Astérix et Obélix partent à sa recherche, mais Goudurix s'amuse bien chez les Vikings, et tombe amoureux d'Abba, la fille de leur chef Grosbaf. Il refuse de repartir avec les deux gaulois. Cryptograf en revanche cherche à marier son fils idiot avec Abba afin de prendre le pouvoir derrière cet homme de paille. Le chef veut d'abord voir une démonstration de vol de Goudurix, que Cryptograf procure au moyent d'un trucage, et le mariage a lieu le jour suivant. À l'aide de potion magique volée à Astérix, Goudurix sauve Abba, Astérix dénonce à Grosbaf les manipulations de Cryptograf, et tous les quatre repartent en Gaule. Ils sont poursuivis par les Vikings, mais ces derniers sont mis en fuite par un chant d'Assurancetourix qui leur a enfin appris la peur.

[ Posted on June 26th, 2011 at 23:45 | no comment | ]

Friday, June 24th, 2011

Matrix Revolutions

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



See Wikipedia's The Matrix Revolutions

[ Posted on June 24th, 2011 at 14:24 | no comment | ]

Tuesday, June 21st, 2011

Police Academy 3: Back in Training

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Police Academy ]



The gorvernor wants to close one of the two police academies, based on the verdict of an evaluation comity. Commandant Lassard asks Mahoney and his friends to come back and train the new recruits. Commandant Mauser (the antagonist from the previous installment), head of the other academy, tries to get Lassard to lose by sending two of his own staff to Lassard's academy. The cadets are quite hopeless, and earn many negative points to Lassard's academy. Eventually, the governor askes representative cadets of both academies to accompany him to a party at the marina, where they are attacked by gangsters disguised as waiters. Lassard's cadet manages to call Mahoney for help, the new recruits come with him to the rescue, and save the governor from kidnapping. Lassard's academy is finally kept running.

[ Posted on June 21st, 2011 at 21:04 | no comment | ]

Tuesday, June 14th, 2011

Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Police Academy ]



Captain Lassard, of the 16th precinct, cannot restore the peace in his area since the neighborhood has been taken over by a mysterious gang. The chief of police gives him 30 days to cleanup and allows him 6 new men, whom Lassard gets from his brother, the Commandant of the Police Academy. The chief also promisses Lieutenant Mauser that if Lassard fails, he would become the new Captain. The new recruits are at first causing trouble, but finally manage to arrest a large number of gangsters. Mauser gets them released under false pretenses. Lassard's brother suggest to organize a fair in the area to strenghthen the bond between the inhabitants and the police, but the fair is raided by the gangsters, Lassard is suspended and Mauser becomes the new Captain. He then suspends Mahoney, who had played several tricks on him. Lassard then convinces Mahoney to infiltrate the gang to discover their hinding place. The operation is a success and the gang is finally arrested.

[ Posted on June 14th, 2011 at 09:25 | 1 comment | ]

Monday, June 13th, 2011

Police Academy

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Police Academy ]



Mahoney, always causing trouble, is given a choice by the friend of his late father who promised to watch over him: either the prison, or the police academy (which has recently opened to anyone). He chooses the latter, hoping to be expelled. Lieutenant Harris, the instructor, who disapproves of allowing anyone to enter the academy, tries to get Mahoney to quit, but the latter cannot quit, otherwise he is thrown in jail. After being the source of much trouble, he is finally expelled, just before a major riot starts in town. He then joins the other cadets, saves the life of Harris (along with another cadet that Harris hates) and eventually graduates, with honors.

[ Posted on June 13th, 2011 at 10:55 | 1 comment | ]

Thursday, June 9th, 2011

An Ideal Husband

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



London, 1895. Sir Robert Chiltern is a successful undersecretary of the Foreign Office, and his marriage is one of the few truly happy ones in the political class. Laura Chevely starts blackmailing Chiltern, threatening to reveal that he had become wealthy after delivering inside information to her former husband (who thenbecame immensly whealthy), in exchange for his recommendation at the Parliament to support of a financial scheme in Argentina where she had invested a lot of money. To motivate him, Laura Chevely reveals Chiltern's secret to his rigorously honnest wife, Lady Gertrude, before Chiltern has resolved to do it himself. Chiltern then visits his friend, the idle Lord Arthur Goring, for advice. But Lady Gertrude had sent a letter to the same Lord Goring for the same reason. Laura Cheveley then pays a visit to Lord Goring, but she is mistaken for Lady Gertrude by the butler, who was told to expected “a lady”. Laura Cheveley, seeing the letter from Lady Gertrude, uses the opportunity to steals yet another embarassing document. When Sir Robert discovers the presence of Laura Cheveley, he leaves the house in rage. The same evening, Lord Robert delivers his speech to the parliament, and his wife, accompanied by her sister in law Mabel, hears him speak against the Argentinan scheme. Laura Cheveley then sends to Sir Robert the letter Lady Gertrude had written to Lord Goring. When Sir Robert discovers the letter, Lady Gertrude is forced to lie to preserve her marriage. Soon after, Lord Goring proposes to Mabel. Sir Robert refuses, because of Lord Goring apparent involvement with Laura Cheveley. But Lady Gertrude then tells the truth about the letter and explains Laura Cheveley's presence in Lord Goring's home that evening. Sir Robert then accepts and all is well that ends well.

[ Posted on June 9th, 2011 at 23:34 | no comment | ]

Saturday, June 4th, 2011

Matrix Reloaded

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



See Wikipedia's The Matrix Reloaded

[ Posted on June 4th, 2011 at 16:23 | no comment | ]

Thursday, April 21st, 2011

Iron Man

Categories: [ TV/Cinema/Marvel ]



Tony Stark inherited a large weapon-manufacturing company. While in Afghanistan for a demonstration of the latest missile of Stark Industries to the US military, he is kidnapped by rebels and forced to build a control system for the missiles (that the rebels seem to have got already, from an unknown source). Wounded by shrapnel during his kidnapping, he is saved by another prisoner, a doctor, who puts an electromagnet on his chest to prevent remaining pieces of metal to enter his heart. Instead of building the control system, Stark first makes a miniature generator to power his electromagnet, but also the iron armored suit that he builds next. With the suit, he escapes the rebels and is later located by US troops. Months after having left for Afghanistan, he is back in the US. There, he wants to stop his company from making weapons, but he is pushed away from executive decisions by Stane, his father's old partner who actually runs the company. Left with plenty of free time, he builds a new armored suit, around a new version of the generator. The suit contains many weapons, an AI and can fly. Stark then flies to Afghanistan as the Iron Man to destroy the Stark Industries weapons in posessions of the rebels. Back in the US, Stark asks his faithful secretary, Pepper Potts, to hack into the company's computer to find the origin of the weapons. She finds out that Stane had sold them to the rebels in exchange for them killing Stark. In the meanwhile, the rebels have found the remnants of Stark's first suit and deliver them to Stane who uses this new technology to make armored suits of his own. Since he cannot replicate the miniature reactor, he goes to Stark's house and steals it. Starks survives by reusing the older version, and fights Stane as Iron Man. Starks obviously wins and eventually tells the press he is the Iron Man (even though his military advisor had prepared a cover story).

[ Posted on April 21st, 2011 at 19:57 | 2 comments | ]

Saturday, April 16th, 2011

Sucker Punch

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



From Wikipedia:

In the 1960s, a 20-year-old girl nicknamed "Babydoll" is institutionalized by her stepfather at t mental hospital after she is blamed for the death of her younger sister (actually defending her against the stepfather who discovered that, at the death of their mother, they would inherit everything). Blue Jones, one of the asylum's orderlies, is bribed by Babydoll's stepfather into forging the signature of the asylum's psychiatrist, Dr. Vera Gorski, to have Babydoll lobotomized, so she can neither inform the authorities of the true circumstances leading to her sister's death, nor reclaim her inheritance. As she enters the institution, she takes note of several items that would be integral if she were to attempt an escape.

In the days prior to her lobotomy, Babydoll retreats to a fantasy world in which she is newly arrived in a brothel owned by Blue, whom she envisions as a mobster. She befriends four other dancers-Amber, Blondie, Rocket and Rocket's older sister, Sweet Pea. Dr. Gorski is envisioned as the girls' dance instructor, and informs Babydoll that her virginity will be sold to a client known as “The High Roller”, who will be arriving in five days. Madam Gorski then encourages Babydoll to perform an erotic dance, during which she fantasizes that she is in feudal Japan, where she meets the Wise Man. After expressing her desire to escape, the Wise Man presents Babydoll with weapons and tells her that if she is to escape, she will need to collect five items: a map, fire, a knife, a key and a fifth, unrevealed item that would require great sacrifice. Before parting ways, the Wise Man instructs Babydoll to defend herself, and she is confronted by three demonic samurai, which she defeats. As her fantasy ends, Babydoll finds herself back in the brothel, her dance impressing Blue and other onlookers.

Inspired by her vision of the Wise Man, Babydoll convinces her friends to prepare an escape from the brothel. She plots to use her dances as a distraction whilst the other girls obtain the tools for their escape. During each of her dances, Babydoll imagines adventurous events that mirror their efforts. These episodes include infiltrating a bunker protected by steam-powered WWI German soldiers to gain the map (mirrored by Sweet Pea entering Blue's office and copying a map of the brothel); storming an orc-infested castle to cut two fire-producing crystals from the throat of a baby dragon (mirrored by Amber stealing a lighter from the breast-pocket of a client); and boarding a train and combating mechanized guards to disarm a bomb (mirrored by Sweet Pea stealing a kitchen knife from the belt of the brothel's cook). During the last of these fantasies, the dance is interrupted, and in the fantasy Rocket sacrifices herself to save Sweet Pea and is killed when the bomb detonates. This is paralleled in the brothel when the cook attempts to stab Sweet Pea as she stole the knife, but Rocket dives in front of the blade and is stabbed herself.

While the girls attempt to procure the knife, Blue, suspecting that the girls are plotting something, overhears Blondie relaying Babydoll's plan to Madam Gorski. After discovering the gruesome scene in the kitchen, Blue has the grieving Sweet Pea locked in a utility closet and confronts the remainder of the girls backstage. He proceeds to make examples of Amber and Blondie, shooting both of them. He then attempts to rape Babydoll, but she stabs him with the kitchen knife and steals his master key from around his neck. She frees Sweet Pea from the closet and the two start a fire with the stolen lighter so that, as a result of the fire alarm, the institution's checkpoint doors unlock. The two manage to escape into the courtyard, where they find the front gate to be blocked by henchmen. Babydoll deduces that the fifth item needed for the escape is in fact herself, and that her sacrifice is needed to complete Sweet Pea's story. She distracts the guards, allowing Sweet Pea to slip out the front gate.

As the henchmen get the better of Babydoll, the scene then cuts back to the asylum in which the surgeon has just performed her lobotomy. As he removes his orbitoclast, he is perturbed by Babydolls expression and starts to question Dr. Gorski as to why she authorized the procedure. Gorski realizes that Blue had forged her signature, and summons the police, who apprehend Blue as he assaults a catatonic Babydoll. Elsewhere, Sweet Pea waits at a bus station where she is stopped by suspicious police. The bus driver, revealed to be the Wise Man from Babydoll's fantasies, misleads the police and allows Sweet Pea to board without a ticket.

[ Posted on April 16th, 2011 at 23:30 | 1 comment | ]

Saturday, April 2nd, 2011

Last Action Hero

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Dany is a kid who prefers going to the movie and watch the adventures of his favourite hero, Jack Slater rather than go to school. His friend Nick, the projectionist of the theatre invites Dany to watch the newest Jack Slater before the premiere. Nick gives Dany a magical ticket that was given to him by Houdini; but Nick never had the courage to try it. Nick splits the ticket and gives Dany the stub. During the movie, the ticket activates and Dany enters the movie just after Slater witnesses the murder of his cousin. Dany never manages to convince Slater that he knows who is the bad guy (Dany saw the villain, Vivaldi, and his henchman, Benedict, reveal their plan earlier on screen), but Slater accepts to pay a visit to Vivaldi's house, which raises Benedict's suspicions. When Dany and Slater are attacked by Benedict, the latter takes Dany's magical ticket and later discovers its use. Meanwhile, Dany and Slater discover Vivaldi's plan to kill his rivals at a funeral, and the heroes save the day. When trying to apprehend Vivaldi and Benedict, the latter flees to the real world using the ticket, and Dany and Slater manage just to follow him through the portal. In the real world, Slater discovers he really is only a fictional character, that the writers gave him a miserable life and that he doesn't like violence anymore. Meanwhile, Benedict visits the theaters of New York City, looking for other movie villains. He finds the Ripper, the villain in the previous Jack Slater movie, and asks him to kill Arnold Schwarzenegger, the actor playing Slater. At the premiere of the new movie, Dany and Slater confront the Ripper and kill him. Benedict is soon killed, but slater is mortally wounded. To save him, Dany understands Slater must return into his movie. Dany steals the ambulance driving Slater to a hospital and takes him to Nick's theatre. He finds the other half of the magic ticket in the trash and gives it to Slater, who quickly returns into his world, with barely a scratch.

[ Posted on April 2nd, 2011 at 16:54 | 1 comment | ]

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

The Simpsons Movie

Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Lake Springfield is terribly polluted, partly by Homer's fault. The EPA decides to islate Springfield under a gigantic dome. The population soon discover that Homer is the cause of it and try to lynch the family, but they manage to escape and flee to Alaska. When Marge sees on TV that the EPA plans to destroy the city, she decides to go back, but Homer refuses. Marge and her family are caught and put back under the dome. Meanwhile, thanks to an inuit shaman, Homer has an epiphany and belives he must save the town in order to save himself. A bomb is lowered by the EPA into the dome through a small hole. Homer causes it to drop into it, but manges to take it out and it eventually explodes and destroys the dome.

[ Posted on March 30th, 2011 at 23:45 | 1 comment | ]

Monday, February 7th, 2011


Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



After Voyager 2 transported a message to the distant stars, a UFO flies over the USA and is shot by the Air Force. The alien arrives near Jenny's house, where it takes the form of her late husband. He then asks her to drive him to Winslow, Arizona where he must rendez-vous with his mothership 3 days later. On the way, he learns some amount of English, and about the ways of humans. Jenny is at first afraid, but she eventually falls in love with him. They are chased by the federal police and the army, but eventually manage to escape thanks to the help of a SETI scientist, advisor the the federal police, but who doesn't approve of the methods of the government. The alien eventually leaves, leaving Jenny pregnant with a son who will one day teach the humans about the alien's civilization.

[ Posted on February 7th, 2011 at 22:59 | 3 comments | ]

Wednesday, January 26th, 2011


Categories: [ TV/Cinema ]



Eragon finds in the forest a stone, which turns out to be a dragon's egg. The egg eventually hatches and the quickly growing blue dragon, samed Saphira, bonds with Eragon. Galbatorix, the despotic king who killed all the dragonriders to take the power, sends his henchmen to kill Eragon (and thus the dragon). Helped by Brom, a storyteller who knows a lot about dragons (having been himself a dragonrider before the death of his mount), they flee to the mountains to join the Varden, rebels to the king. During their journey, Eragon has recurring dreams of a young woman; in the last dream, she tells him she is a prisoner in Galbatorix's fortress. Againt's Brom's judgement, Eragon and Saphira fly to the castle, infiltrate it and are caught by Galbatorix's lieutenant Durza, a sorcerer. They manage to escape with the woman, named Arya, but Brom is killed. Eragon and Arya join the Varden, and with their help repell the attack of Galbatorix's army and kill Durza. In the end, Galbatorix is seen unveiling another dragon.

[ Posted on January 26th, 2011 at 23:45 | no comment | ]